Bumble Bestie Boy Drama
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Like many I get frustrated with the apps, occasionally I will pop on BFF Bumble and try to connect with like-minded single women for social networking/HH, etc… I had met a woman and we met for a handful of HH’s/dinners over an 8-month period…. As pathetic as it is, we would share dating story’s, etc… It clearly became evident that our lifestyles and interests did not align… as she drank excessively, was unemployed, and was guy crazy! I could barely have a convo at a bar/restaurant without her scoping out the area, it was literally ridiculous… mind you we’re in our early 50s. I haven’t spoken to her in 6-7 months and don’t plan to.
I matched with a guy in the past week and we have discussed meeting in the next week (I’m recovering from covid). When I saw his pic, I’m thinking to myself he looks familiar… but you see some of the peeps online after a while. I now realized that this guy had met/hung out with the girl I no longer speak with (she had showed me a pic… it’s a curse, I have a pretty good visual memory.)
Would it be weird to meet this guy after now realizing he hung out/dated this woman I no longer speak with? I’m all about girl code and would never meet someone my friend dated, but I don’t know what level of relationship they had after I stopped hanging out with her. Knowing her, she did prob sleep with him. I feel there’s a lot of crossover when it comes to decent looking/career men on these sites… and mind you I live in a decent sized area (Mpls/St. Paul). Thoughts? Thx
Let’s first establish that Girl Code is not a thing and that it was invented by women to gatekeep men from other women. Not dating your friend’s ex is simple courtesy and common sense. Ity’s not some arbitrary code of conduct.
That said, this woman was not your friend. At best she was a casual acquaintance. Making friends as we get older is difficult. Like dating, we need to learn who’s in it for the right reasons versus who is looking for someone to enable their unhealthy behavior. We also need to be clear on what our intentions are so we can attract people with the same goals.