He Calls It Checking In. I Call It Stalking.
Just because he’s not in physically close proximity doesn’t mean what he’s doing isn’t predatory.
Please Submit Your Dating Questions
If we use your question on the podcast you’ll receive a free 7-day subscription so you can listen to the episode/read the post. We’re preparing to record next week’s episodes and could use your questions!!
This guy and I exclusively saw each other for 10 months. He ended things with me in a very cold and callous way. Afterwards, he did some weird stuff like show up at my workplace and hang around my area. For months following our “break up” he continued to contact me via various social media platforms.
Eventually, I told him to stop messaging me because I was very hurt by what occurred and didn’t want or need him in my life. When asked about the aforementioned “weird behavior” he tried to play it off as a coincidence. The last time we spoke was October (after I last blocked him on fb) & today he added me on Snapchat. The reason is: that he wishes me well and has no ulterior motives. He’s said that exact phrase every single time he (unnecessarily) reaches out, then proceeds to chat me up and be semi-flirty. I’ve never had a guy do any of this before and it’s very strange.
We broke up in Jan 2021, he already “apologized” last summer and there is no reason to stay in contact. What do you think is truly going on here? Is this guy extremely manipulative?
Or am I overreacting/ reading too much into things? I feel like he does indeed have ulterior motives.
This kind of behavior is problematic for the simple reason that it causes you great confusion. Which, I suspect, is the point. He doesn’t want to be with you but he also does not want you to forget him.