Is She Intimidating Or Are They Just Intimidated?
On my last few dates I’ve noticed a trend: The men tell me they are nervous at the beginning of the date and somewhere throughout the date they tell me that I’m really “cool or down to earth or that I have my life together.” The conversation is usually pretty solid and there seems to be a mutual interest. After the date, there’s nothing but radio silence on the guy’s end. I take the lack of response as they’re not interested and move on. But the men seem attuned, engaged, and genuine during the date. I’m starting to think I’m intimidating. Any thoughts? I always appreciate your perspective!
You very well might be intimidating. To them. Confidence can be misconstrued as arrogance. Intellect as elitist. Direct as abrasive. How we are perceived by others has as much to do with our behavior as it does with other people’s insecurities.
What intrigues me about their comments is, that upon just a moment of analysis, they all reflect poorly on these men. What’s the benefit of telling someone how nervous you are other than to set the bar really low? Why would you willingly reveal insecurity like that when the goal of the first date is to make a good first impression?