Men Will Always Show You Who They Are The First Time
This guy texted me three times over the last six months asking to meet up. He knew I was looking for a relationship last time we went out a year ago, claimed to be on the same page but sent mixed signals so I jumped ship. Before that, we saw each other for three months in 2018.
This time around I agreed, the plan was to catch up and get some fresh air outside until our reservations at 9:30. On the “date” while we were chatting, he made me cancel the reservation because he “didn’t like the food there” He suggested we pick up a pizza and go back to his place to eat and have drinks instead. We already had 2 drinks outside (over 1.5 hours) and had two drinks while waiting for the pizza, then ubered back to his.
Once we got there shit hit the fan REAL QUICK because I had the liquid courage to bring up why I repeatedly ignored him over the months. Put my reasons out there and directly asked him why I heard from him/ why he wanted to hangout. In other words (he didn’t have the guts to say) he just wanted to hook up, mentioned liking someone else and it didn’t work out and was trying to have me as a FWB.
I was drunk and so rattled by the outright disrespect and audacity I remember saying “I’m not someone you can call up every couple of months to get laid. I think more highly of myself and believe I deserve to treated with more respect” After saying my piece I said I wanted to leave and stormed out, didn’t even get to eat any pizza!! I’m shook and feeling so crappy right now; I’ve had so many disappointing dating experiences recently I bawled my eyes out once I got home.
This guy texted me three times over the last six months asking to meet up
Somebody reaching out after ghosting who thinks they made a mistake or sincerely wanted to make things right wouldn’t sporadically check in. They would make their intentions known by being persistent while respecting your boundaries. This guy popped in and out of your life at his convenience. Fuck that guy. In the future, if someone behaves this way, you can either not respond or reply and tell them while you appreciate the follow-up, that you’ve moved on and don’t wish to stay in touch. Unless you say it - unless you are explicit - they will continue to pester you until they wear you down and convince you they must really like you to be trying this hard for this long.