"Pick me. Choose me. Love me."
Shonda Rhimes did not intend for this straightforward line of dialogue from Season 2, Episode 5 of Grey's Anatomy to be the inspiration for an anti-feminist archetype.
The term "Pick-Me-Girl" describes women who seek validation from men by presenting themselves as "different" or "better" than other women. This behavior often involves rejecting traditionally feminine traits or subtly putting down other women to stand out and appear more desirable to men.
Pop culture was first introduced to Samantha Jones when Sex and The City premiered in 1998. The Cool Girl ( aka the original Pick-Me-Girl) had yet to be summarized so bitingly in Gillian Flynn's Gone Girl. Back then, we used slang like 'tomboy' and 'guy's girl' as a stand-in for women who prioritized men over women. They were the ones who said they couldn't relate to other women and were nothing but drama. (Once again, the blame is placed on women.) That was their excuse for not having any female friends. But let's not forget the societal pressures that shaped their behavior, pressures that we, as a society, need to address and change.
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